Thursday, March 17, 2011

Learning Lessons

I have learned in my short Christian Life (of 6 almost 7 years now...) that Life will be full of lessons.  Once we learn one lesson then its just on to the next, often tougher and harder than the last to learn. Since I am an open book I want to share with you some of the "lessons" I feel that I am learning now. I am sharing in hopes to gain your wisdom and also in hopes you can relate in some way. I also should say that in learning lessons I have found that prayer to show me the lesson and show me how to learn it quickly and permanently, it seems to help the process, (or I think it does.. LOL)
One thing I am learning right now is how to "tap in" to the Holy Spirit. I find myself pondering if I really utilize the Holy Spirit like I could?  I'm not necessarily talking about "healing" "prophecy" etc... (although I don't count those out) I am talking about utilizing the spirit for "joy" "patience" "love" etc...  I am convinced that just like we only use a small portion of our brains, we also only utilize a portion of the power of the Holy Spirit.  So I am praying and asking God to show me how I can be overwhelmed with joy, love, patience, kindness, etc.. that can only come from the power of the Holy Spirit....
Going along with the conversation topic of the Holy Spirit, I was recently told in a bible study that if you are not "peace filled" - as in I am "aggravated, frustrated, annoyed, not peaceful, enter your words here ____________" than you are not living by the spirit but by the flesh. This was very convicting to me, if you ask my husband I often say "I am so frustrated about ________________" (enter many things in the blank)  but in other words "I am so frustrated and just going to pout in my flesh rather than look to the spirit to help me out with this...."  So this is a lesson I am trying to really learn because I do want to be a joyful person, and my husband would probably love for me to not say "I am frustrated about ________" all the time.. LOL
And while I feel God is teaching me things constantly the last major (and somewhat painful) lesson he is teaching me right now is this.... People don't need ME, they need GOD. This is a pride swallowing lesson, because I want to be "needed." Who doesn't right?  But ultimately I am NOT savior, I am NOT all knowing, I am NOT... well anything without God...  My husband and I work with youth and really enjoy that at our Church. We have invested our lives in youth. We literally have poured out all we have for them in hope that they will see God's love flowing through us into them... BUT, they are still youth, growing teenagers, and just like I do every day they make mistakes, they flub up... And one day I was praying and asking God, "Are we doing any good? Are we even helping you ? Are we really helping these people you've put in our lives, because I am not completely sure we're doing a good job here?" And that is when God told me.... "they don't need YOU, they need ME."  I was like "ok God duh.." but than he quietly said to me... "No Dawn... they don't need you, they just need me...."  So this lesson is a little painful for the girl who wants to be needed... but as all lessons are, its a step in the growth chart....
I am thankful God cares enough to spend some time "teaching" me, and even though it is painful I look forward to the other lessons he has for me... I wonder if you know what God is trying to teach you right now? Patience, Kindness, Love????  He wants to help us evolve into the best people we can be, just like we want to help our children grow to be amazing adults as well... Really such a great parallel as a parent to understand his love.. HIS unending, overwhelming, overflowing LOVE... His.. PERFECT LOVE!

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